Flush

Is it wrong that I sometimes get into a panic about using all the toilet paper on the roll? Just hear me out. I am currently sharing an apartment with another human being. One that I love dearly, and that person also uses toilet paper now and then. One that (quite reasonably) expects me to change the empty toilet roll and replace it with a new one as and when my arse sees fit to do it’s “Brown Baron” impersonation and commences with its bombing run on the bog. Recently. I seem to have decided that I actually don’t like the whole pavlova of taking the old roll off, going to the cupboard, putting the new roll on, and putting the empty one in the recycling bin. It appears that I’m a bit of a lazy so and so?

Who knew?

Anyway, recently, while pooing and wiping, I seem to have gone to great lengths to make sure that I don’t use all the bog paper while on “my shift”. To the point where the other day, I left a quarter of a sheet of 2-ply on the tube and I’m pretty sure that that comes dangerously close to being classed as “using all the loo roll”. But in my Ally McBeal brain, I have rationalised that if there is still some paper on there, then that roll hasn’t run out, and therefore, I don’t have to be the one to go through the pullover of changing the roll.

So why then do I feel like Groomie is going to kick my arse if I keep getting away with this?